…using memes to communicate my thoughts today.
…using memes to communicate my thoughts today.
The question, “How are you doing?” can feel like a loaded question that others ask me. It can also feel like a routine question instead of a sincere question. Oftentimes, I feel uncomfortable getting asked this question by others because I don’t know how to interpret it. Most of the time, I am compelled to answer, “Oh, I’m good or I’m fine”. The reason I am so quick to answer in this mannar is because I am confused if this is just another person’s way to greet me, or if they really do want to know how I am doing.
In most cases, I can tell if it was used as a greeting or if someone was really wanting to know more information. Sadly though, I can’t recall the last time someone genuinely asked me or took the time to find out how I was actually doing and took the time to challenge me to go beyond the closed ended response I give. After responding, I am also typically prone to close the book on that question in regards to how I am doing and I return the same question to the person I am talking with. I admit that I almost expect a similar response from them in return most of the time. The conversation ends as quickly as it started and you are left feeling empty, almost like you never even talked to someone at all.
This conversation starter question or greeting can be a dead end question. It often leads to a dead end exchange between two people. This is sad, but I’m sure many of you can also relate to what I am talking about. I am asked how I am doing almost on a daily basis. Yet, I honestly can say that I can’t remember the last time someone geuninely asked me how I was doing and when I responded that I was good or fine, they then took the added steps to find out what that means or ask follow up questions to ensure I am ok. I am also responsible for not going that extra mile at times too. It can feel out of place and awkward. I wonder though, when we as friends, family and neighbors just got so busy to reach out and go that extra mile in conversation though?
In conversation, follow up questions are so important & in today’s world I find it so important in conversation with others to find out how someone is really doing. If you want to greet someone, say Hello or Good-morning don’t confuse them by asking how they are doing without actually wanting to know more. Ask questions with intent in really letting someone know you care how they are doing. I often think about the many times I have told others that I was good or that I was fine when I really wasnt and in those moments, I was hoping they would reach out further to me. It saddens me to know how many people I have came across in my lifetime where I haven’t reached out to them in their time of need as well simply because I didn’t reach out and extend myself further. You just never know how really taking the time to find out how someone is doing could change their entire day or their life.
If someone responds in a way that makes your conversation dead quickly and you really do want to know how they are doing, here are some other pointers to help them open up to truly make sure they are fine:
-Put away all distractions and give them your undivided attentions (yes, put that damn cell phone away and actually make eye contact with this person).
-Actually listen and pay attention to their body language.
-Ask encouraging questions that let them know you are interested in their lives.
-Make it clear that you have time to talk to them and that you are here if they need to talk and that you care about them.
-Continue asking questions that prompt them to open up and let them know you care.
-Follow up with them in a day or two to let them know you are thinking about them and just checking in.
Today, I challenge you to ask someone how they are doing, but ask them with intent. Stop and look them in the eye. Do it with sincerity. Do it with care. Do it with love. Do it in support. Do it with meaning. This time of year especially is hard on people. Reach out & go that extra mile. Be present. Be there. Be a friend. Don’t stop there, follow up with them and continue to let them know you care and are there for them. Sometimes words are not enough either, random acts of kindness also go a long ways!
So, today I am asking you Mombies out there how are you doing? I will not take I’m fine or I’m good for an answer. Truly, how are you doing? I care and I know all to well the stresses and struggles go hand in hand with the love and joys you feel towards your children and partners in life but if we are honest with each other we know that we are not always fine and good. Life can feel like you are up and down and all around. I’d love to hear your honest responses in my comments, I’m here to listen and actively respond to anything you’d like to get off your chest.
This is basically how our week is going in my household. First my 5 year old was hit with the flu on Sun-Mon and our 1 year old was hit with it Tues and is still out of sorts from it today. I know so many others who have been hit with this virus and it is seriously no joke. It hits hard & it hits fast and likes to play dominos by knocking out each and every single family member. I’m wondering who’s gonna be next? My husband or myself? Knock on wood we have not yet gotten it but I fear the worst given what I’ve been hearing from others.
For those unlucky followers that have also been hit with this flu, I am sorry! If you already have suffered with it, or if you currently are, my deepest sympathy goes out to you. Our washing machine has been going strong since Sunday afternoon. I feel like I’m getting high off lysol fumes and I have that permanent puke smell imbedded in my nose.
I’m burnt out and keep praying to see the end of this madness.
Not only that, but it’s so hard seeing your kiddos sick. I’ve been doting them with endless TLC but when you are doing everything in your power to make them well and they still are sick, it’s just no fun. I know it will run its course no mater how much motherly love I give them, but I am getting impatient. As you can see in the picture above, my little one was just a lifeless noodle yesterday. It was heartbreaking.
Hopefully my kiddos kick this soon and we (my hubby and I) somehow dodge the bullet. Wish us luck! Wish me luck especially because it’s one thing if I get this bug, but we all know it’s another thing when our husbands get sick. Dear God spare at least my husband from this!!!!!!!!!!
Guess what arrived at our house Sunday afternoon? Yep. You guessed it…the flu bug. Was it the ice cream pail, in the picture, that gave the answer away?! Growing up, our go to puke bucket was always an ice cream pail, so I figured I should carry on the tradition.
This nasty virus quickly invaded my oldest daughter’s little body without her (or my) permission. Not only that, but it invaded her little boyd fast and furious. She was to the point where she couldn’t even keep water down. As you can imagine this was not enjoyable for her, poor little lady! However, it also wasn’t fun for my husband and I.
As a parents, we always hate to see our little’s sick and we do everything in our power to dote them with love and affection and give into any little thing they need or want in that moment. However, this can take it’s toll on you and as the caregiver it can easily become exhausting. When this happens you may start to get burnt out. This proved true in our household yesterday as silly little arguments quickly ensued between my husband and I as the day went on. How can this be avoided? It really can’t. It happens and it is all part of the “fun”. However, there are little things we can do for ourselves, while our caregiving abilities are being exhausted to the max. Here are a few tips:
I hope the flu bug stays at bay for all of you and I am crossing my fingers that myself and the rest of my family do not experience this flu bug either. Good luck!
*Note* This is Wednesday, you are not mistaken. I forgot to post the finished draft yesterday which was Tuesday. Sorry for the confusion!
It is Monday again, poof…just.like.that! I spent the last week away (sorry for my lack of blogging all week) and continued our Thanksgiving tradition of heading to Western Wisconsin to spend quality time with my parents, spent the week back at home-home, celebrated the Thanksgiving holiday with them & also carried on our gun-deer hunting with my dad (In case you are wondering, my dad & my hubby were lucky and each got themselves a deer, but I did not).
Human I am because it’s been hard to snap back into the swing of things since being back. As bittersweet as it is to be back home, I am ready to get my girls back into their daily routines and rock this last week of November. However, we will be quickly switching gears to the next holday, like ASAP! Dun…Dun…Dun, to Christmas! Seems hard to believe almost.
When arriving home, I noticed we were one of the few neighbors in our sub division with Fall decor lingering on our front porch and instead, lack of Christmas spirit and holiday dazzle. Once I had a free moment upon getting home, I quickly pulled the ginormous scarecrow inside, along with a pumpkin and a cute Fall sign. I felt like I had been living in a time warp at my parents to be honest and was almost shocked as we entered our neighborhood that was now Christmas to the max. All of a sudden, it just hit me, I realized my “vacation” was ended and I was flooded with the reality of my enourmous amout of “to-do’s” that awaited me as soon as I walked in our door. UGHHH!
If you are like me, it can be hard getting back into the swing of things after an extended time away from your home and on top of that having to switch gears to a new holiday can add to the stress and the tasks add up so quickly. Here are my top 10 tips to motivate you to keep on top of your to-do’s and getting back into your routines. Your never-ending list can be tackled, I promise.
Hoping all you Mombie’s out there have an easy Monday and find these tips helpful. If not, sometimes all you can do is throw your hair up and tell yourself, what doesn’t get done today will get done tomorrow, take a deep breath and fill that coffee cup up AGAIN. Good luck!
…and just like that we’ve come full circle & my baby is a 1 year old.