Motivational Monday for Mombies

I walked into our main bathroom that primarily my two girls use. I only walked inside because the light was on and no one was using it. My anxiety quickly peaked when I once again noticed that the toilet was not flushed after it had clearly been used. Not to mention it was full with what appeared to be an entire roll of toilet paper inside. There was also pee dribbles on the toilet seat. Toilet paper pieces were ripped up into tiny pieces all over the floor. The hand towel was also on the floor. I nearly stubbed my toe on the stool walking into the bathroom. The soap dispenser was knocked over on its side & the counter had a pool of water all over it.

Taking a deep breath, I flushed the toilet saying a prayer that another big mess was not about to overflow onto the floor. Thankfully the toilet did not overflow. Frustrated, I cleaned up the pee dribbles on the seat. Feeling very annoyed, I picked up the toilet paper pieces on the floor, followed by picking up the hand towel and wiping up the pool of water on the counter.

Next, I found a clean & dry hand towel to hang back up where it actually belongs. Then, I put the stool back by the tub so no one would stub their toe like I almost did. I shut the bathroom light off and walked out into the living room. My husband and two girls were relaxing on the couch without a care in the world. I quickly felt even more annoyed.

Secretly, I began wishing and muttering under my breath that I wish I didn’t have a care in the world. Except that thought was interrupted as the laundry machine buzzing. Great, this meant that our bedding needed to be thrown in the dryer and the rest of our bedding needed to be thrown in the washing machine. Clearly, a magic fairy wasn’t going to come and do it for me.

Once I was done with switching out the laundry, I came back out to the living room thinking I could possibly join my family who was all still relaxing. However, my eyes instead noticed that the bathroom light was back on. Seriously! Dang it anyways! I could see the stool was positioned right in front of the door again. With a sigh of frustration, I walked back towards the bathroom knowing that the scene in there would likely be the same scene it had been 2.2 seconds ago. Sure enough, it was almost identical and I found myself doing the exact same tasks I did just moments before. No worries, Mombie is the word!

Except, this Mombie feels like I’m going bat shit crazy. I am so exhausted from this very situation. I truly don’t understand and it honestly makes me mad at some of the people I love most int his whole world. When I say I need a vacation-I mean, a vacation from this nonsense! Not only am I a wife and a mom, but apparently I have also taken on the roll of a magic fairy, the very one I wish that I had for myself. Except, there is no magic fairy for Mombies. I don’t remember signing up for any of this, but apparently is is some unwritten rule that Mombies have to clean up messes they don’t make.

I need a break from this. When I say I need a break, I mean a vacation away by myself. A hot minute away from this nonsense would be a much needed mental health break. I am tired of it and sometimes I feel like my entire household is blinded by all the little things I do behind the scenes while they are carefree. Sometimes, I feel like if I left them to fend for themselves for a week, maybe if I came back they would appreciate me more somehow.

My husband wonders why I am so tired, irritable, and “never in the mood”. My children wonder why I am yelling all the time and never have time to play. Seriously? This is a legitimate reason why. Sometimes I wish I could just tell them to be their own damn magic fairy BUT then I would be living in a messy nightmare 24/7 because they can’t seem to find their wings to do anything themselves.

If this story resonates with you sweet Mombie, know you are not alone. If you are feeling like you are going bat shit crazy it is likely for good reason. Don’t let anyone tell you otherwise. Maybe it really is time to hang up those magic fairy wings for a bit and quit doing it all for everyone else. Take that vacation alone that you so desperately need & deserve. We all need mental health breaks, and often Mombies are the ones who need them the most! I mean, isn’t it about time that they start cleaning up their own pee dribbles!?

Free Friday

Scrolling Facebook, I keep seeing this drawing by Anna Lewis. I couldn’t resist sharing it on my blog with all of you. This is a very powerful image and one that brings tears to my eyes. As a mom, I worry that sometimes I haven’t been a perfect mom or wonder what it would be like if I were flawless in my parenting as my girl’s mom.

However, there really is no such thing as a perfect mom and we all need to let go of that expectation of ourselves. It’s the idea of being perfect that sets us up for failures. Our children are always watching and often model what they observe or see. When we think we have to be perfect, our children will follow suit. Ultimately, this will set them up for a lifetime of disappointments and hardships not only in the real world, but within themselves. Also, by trying to display perfection is letting our children down.

The days that we allow failure to creep in and we allow ourselves to know that we tried the best that we can and let that be good enough is truly everything. Even communicating the mere words, “I tried my best” to your children is everything. Letting your kids know that they tried their best today and allowing that to be enough is EVERYTHING. Even more, is the love you show your child(ren) is there even when there are imperfections or flaws in our days. Telling them that they are enough in those moments and that you love them speaks volumes.

As moms, we strive to do our best every single day. Doing our best, doesn’t look perfect. Making mistakes and failing is part of life. We learn from mistakes and failures and by allowing ourselves to fall down, we gain wisdom. Growth is then taking place and we evolve…and so do our kids. With a lot of love, guidance & support it is important we allow our child(ren) to be who they are, imperfections and all and continue to not only tell them how much we love them no matter what, but to also show them how much we love them no matter what.

We all carry around a lot of ‘stuff’. Both parents and children have weights that they carry on the daily. We can either get weighed down by trying to be perfect or we can lighten our load and make room for mistakes, flaws, and imperfections. There is failure in perfection, but in trying our best there is no failure. Let trying your best always be enough, because at the end of the day it will be the one thing that feels sufficient.

Thankful Thursday

My girl joined the toothless smile club last night and officially lost her first baby tooth. She has been really anxious to lose her first tooth because most of her class has lost teeth already. Some of her classmates have lost over 8 teeth already. She was feeling a bit left behind. To say she is excited is an understatement. Last night was quite the ordeal getting it out, but she was brave and we managed to get that baby out! I’m so thankful she was able to cross this milestone that she has patiently been waiting for. She was crying tears of joy last night because she was so relieved that it FINALLY happened. My heart was just so happy for her.

My heart was also feeling a little bittersweet. To be selfish, her baby teeth are really the last “babyish” thing left about my first born. A part of me wanted to cry because it is hard to see your babies grow up. Selfishly I just want time to slow down. It is so much harder knowing that we can not have another baby and I really just cherish all of theses milestones and moments knowing that they are so special.

This week, I’ve been moved by a song by Nichole Nordeman. It is called, Slow Down and it makes me so incredibly emotional listening to it. However, I’m thankful that I discovered it because it really does give me all the feels and make me realize yet again how truly blessed I am to have my two girls in my life and that I get to be their mom and be a part of all their milestones and special moments. Being a parent is truly a gift and my girls are my everything. I am beyond thankful for them each and every single day.

Grab the tissues and listen to the song that has been touching my heart:

Wondering on Wednesday

We survived our first no-school-snow-day yesterday, in case you are wondering. However, I’m not going to lie that this was my initial reaction to receiving the notification…

My daughter on the other hand was extremely excited over her impromptu day off. She looked more like this when I dropped the news to her…

I have to admit, after the initial annoyance wore off that I would not be able to continue on with my day as planned, I actually was looking forward to spending some extra time with E and giving her a great snow day ahead. So, I casted aside everything else and we enjoyed our unexpected day off together.

First of all, the girls decided they needed to bring everything they owned out of their bedrooms and out into the living room. This could have easily triggered an anxiety attack for me but I decided to just let them make a mess, have fun, and enjoy playing together. I’ve learned over the years that when siblings are actually getting along, laughing together and having fun that you just let them continue doing what they are doing because we all know that peace won’t last for long. You enjoy that loveliness while it lasts.

After they started arguing a bit (I told you the peace doesn’t last long) we decided a snow day called for making chocolate chip cookies. Both girls agreed and were already deciding who would get to eat the most cookie dough once everything was mixed together. Baking with my girls has always been something I enjoy doing with them and they equally enjoy the experience with me as well. We all took turns measuring and mixing and eating our fill of delicious chocolate chip cookie dough to our hearts content!

Next up, was getting outside and playing in the 7″ of snow that was dumped on us last night. I mean, nothing completes a snow day other then actually playing in the white stuff that gave us a day off to begin with. We cleaned up our cookie mess and then got all of our outdoor gear on, which can actually be quite the chore and if and when you actually get outside it feels like a reward. The girls had so much fun climbing on the huge mounds of snow, jumping off them, digging out a snow fort, and sliding down our hill. We even trudged through all the snow to the back yard and played on the swing set a bit. However, all outside fun comes to an end quickly when cheeks begin to get more rosy then what is comfortable, socks are coming off in boots, and little ones complain that their snow clothes are wet and they are freezing cold.

It was time to go in and eat lunch. The girls were craving comfort and warmth and nothing fills that better then some tomato soup and grilled cheese sandwiches! Our most favorite way to eat tomato soup is to fill our bowls with goldfish crackers. Then topping our delicious lunch off with our awesome chocolate chip cookies is exactly what we did. Our bellies were full and our bodies were tired.

Snow days also would not be complete without a little rest and relaxation and if you are lucky enough, a nap. So, we curled up together and read some books. K decided she was ready for a full blown nap and E decided she wanted to have a little time on her tablet. Once K fell asleep I suggested that she invite a friend over to play and put the tablet away.

Lucky for E, her delightful friend down the street came over a little after 1pm and stayed until just before dinnertime and lucky for me K napped that entire time! The older girls had a lovely time playing and I managed to fold a basket of laundry and put it away, pick up the tornado that was my upstairs and reward myself by reading some of my book.

Our snow day was actually a breath of fresh air and sometimes the unexpected has a way of giving us exactly what we need. I enjoyed the simple joys of the day and making memories with my girls. Snow days are meant to be enjoyed and that is exactly what we did. It also brought up some cherished memories of snow days I had when I was a kid and made me miss those stay at home days with my own mom.

Aimless 20 Talk Tuesday

1. We got around 7″ of snow last night. E is getting her first snow day of the school year, which started off as a 2 hour delay. I really wish they would have just canceled from the beginning because I’ve now wasted a good 3 hours of my morning.
2. Last night I finished reading a book called, “The Puppy That Came for Christmas”, by Megan Rix. It was about a couple who wanted to have a baby but couldn’t, so they began training pups to become service dogs for disabled individuals. They found a joy in becoming puppy parents but falling in love with the pups and then having to let them go was hard, especially when dealing with their own infertility grief. Eventually they got their own puppy and it gave them a joy they never knew possible. In Balance Magazine describes this book as, “A heartwarming true story of loss, love, and the real meaning of family that we loved so much, we couldn’t put it down.” Typically it takes me forever to read a book, and I read this one in four days. If you are looking for a heartwarming read, I recommend this cute story!
3. Currently, I’m four chapters deep into a new book, “High Achiever”, by Tiffany Jenkins. I can tell this is going to be a fast read for me as well because I already don’t want to put it down.
4. It just dawned on me too that the district is closed on Friday this week too, so it will be a really short week. Saturday E has her Winter Dance camp and on Sunday she has a birthday party to attend. Her social calendar is busier then mine these days!
5. I just read a meme that said, “Come here you BIG BEAUTIFUL cup of coffee & lie to me about how much we’re going to get done today.” Given that it’s a snow day and my entire day is rearranged, I will get nothing done-nothing. Coffee is in full swing though, that we are doing!
6. Yesterday I started making a list of things I like about my current house and a list of things I dislike. So far, it is four pages. I told my husband to do the same so we could compare lists. We’ve been looking at floor plans and having a difficult time trying to decide what we want. We’ve got plenty of time right now before we are to the point of needing to finalize our decision but knowing how hard BIG decisions are to make for us we really need to start the process now.
7. We took the girls rollerskating at the roller rink near our house on Saturday. It was so nice to have a quality afternoon together doing something we all enjoy. I am amazed at how quickly E picked up the skill and at only 3 years old, how well K does without using a bar. They always amaze me. I feel kind of guilty we haven’t gotten them into ice skates too much yet (K has never been ice skating). That is one thing as a kid I remember doing a lot and having lots of fun doing it.
8. We may have to make some chocolate chip cookies today since it’s a snow day! I also was told by my husband that I need to dig out a snow fort for the girls…we will see how ambitious I am feeling today. He may be doing that with them when he gets home from work!
9. I’ve hit my slump again and not feeling very motivated with working out. I’ve been hitting all of my Saturday workouts and playing soccer on Thursdays but man it’s hard to motivate myself to get the other two workouts it. It sounds pathetic because it’s not that much either. I blame Winter. I’m over it!
10. I helped my sister paint three bedrooms in her house on Sunday & I woke up on yesterday feeling like a 90 year old women who had to take ibuprofen to take the edge off. My knees are bruised and swollen from being on them while edging…sadly, my fingers even hurt to text. Who knew painting could affect my body all over in that way. I am so thankful I was able to help her though because it was a big job. I couldn’t help her finish yesterday and it sounded like she had another long day painting yesterday. I felt awful I couldn’t help her out again.
11. This is your friendly reminder to drink water. I love throwing this one in here on Aimless 20 Talk Tuesday!
12. We bought an air hockey table at Costco for Christmas & the score keeper started to not work. Thankfully my handy husband was able to fix it. It sounded like it was a common issue with that Air Hockey Table (we did not read reviews beforehand and should have). I am so grateful that my hubby is so handy.
13. If you are in a place where you need a break. Take one. You need it more then you probably even realize.
14. All the dogs in my neighborhood are outside playing in the snow together, seeing them running around together makes me so happy-it’s clearly a snow day for them too, they don’t have to be cooped up inside today while their humans are at work and school!
15. K is losing it today. She just looked at the Calendar and asked if Santa was coming tomorrow and said that when we make cookies we can make them for Santa. I suggested we make them for Daddy instead and she got a very angry look on her face and said, “No Santa”.
16. E is still trying to get her two lose teeth out…any tips on how to get them out faster?
17. The girls and I need hair trims (I need a color job too). It is so difficult scheduling dates. This is why I only get my hair cut/colored like 4x a year and rarely get the girls trims. However, you get to a point where you just can’t deal with it anymore and it needs to be done!
18. Apparently my hubby is going skiing on Saturday with his sister, brother in law and their kids. I can’t wait to deal with him on Sunday listening to how badly his body hurts.
19. I’m on the verge of having a stuffed animal free house hold. Is it just me or are stuffed animals annoying to have? My girls always gravitate to them too, ugh-they are just dumb.
20. Well-today should be fun said no mom ever.

Motivational Monday for Mombies

It feels like everyone I know is sick with this or that. Overall, our household has had a pretty healthy winter. My sister and her family were just hit with the tummy bug & now my neighbors amongst so many of my daughter’s friends at school. Winter’s can be so hard when colds, flu’s and viruses hit.

As a mom, it can be especially difficult when we get sick. Mombies do not have time to get sick-there is just no room for it whatsoever! How do you take care of yourself & still take care of the rest of your family? It feels near impossible when this happens & can be really stressful. Moms seem to stay sick even longer because we are run down, are not getting appropriate amounts of rest or quality sleep at night and still are taking care of everything we normall do while we are sick. Heck, we can’t even rememer to drink fluids because we are pushing everyone else to keep up their fluid intake.

Seriously, I am knocking on wood right now that we continue to stay as healthy as we have this Winter and we also have yet to get the dreaded tummy bug (which in my opinion is the absolute worse). Since I consider myself a fairly seasoned Mombie now, I’d like to offer up some advice on how to get through this sick season-especially right now when it seems to be hitting fast and hard.

1. As hard as it may be for you, ask for help! Mama-you are the glue that holds your house together. I know it and you know it! Things just don’t run smoothly when you are down for the count. The goal is to get well as soon as possible and this means you need to take care of you (not anyone else). Recruit someone to help you do those everyday things and especially anything that involves caretaking. Your kids (and your hubby) CAN and WILL surive without you while you are on the mend.
2. Keep items you will need when you are sick stock piled in your house. This is such an important trip because the last thing you feel like doing is having to run to the store when you are not well or having to ask your significant other to run and get you something. A few staple things I have on hand are chicken soup, crackers, 7-up, kleenex, puke buckets, cough drops and other cold meds (and fever reducing meds), emergen-c/Vit C, popcicles, etc. This sets you up for comfort and rest to get you through.
3. Avoid your husband asking “what is for dinner or what should I make for dinner”. I always have some meals pre-made in my freezer that are easy thaw out and heat up making dinner eazy. If you are not one to pre-make meals, always have easy things for your husband to make and eat for him and the kids so he doesn’t have to bug you with this annoying question. Men eat anything-so corndogs, chicken nuggets, mac & cheese, pot pies, frozen pizza are all good options!
4. Have an emergency binder ready. This will include phone numbers of family members or friends, doctor/insurance info, instructions and daily routines of your kids so their is no question of how to take care of them or what they will need-it will all be in one nice little binder for you to hand over to whoever you asked to help you out with your kids while you rest and recover! This creates a worry free day for you because things are all in black and white and their should be no questions!
5. Fill up water bottles in advance and keep them at your side so you keep up your fluid intake without having to continue to get up and down to refill your drink. Water intake is so important while you are sick and will help hydrate and flush out the ick!
6. When in question, see your doctor. You may find relief in getting an antibiotic if applicapable. There is no shame in taking an anitbiotic if it will help you feel better!
7. Rest is best. No guilt in a day of Netflix on the couch or in bed. If you can, relax fully so you can actually get some quality sleep.
8. Wash your hands often and use hand sanitizer to avoid the spread and keep yourself healthier.

Wishing you all a healthy rest of Februrary and March. For those of you not well currently-please take care of you and feel better soon. It’s almost Spring you guys…I can already imagine the snow melting, the cold vanishing and the birds singing and the germs starting to hibernate!

Free Friday

Happy Valentine’s Day! I saw this posted in my Facebook feed and it truly is the reality of how my husband and I are. As a women, we all have this expectation of how V-Day should look. When you find yourself in the reality above you can set yourself up to be disapointed. Honestly, this is no one’s fault but your own, not even your husbands.

Truth be told, my husband loves me in a million different ways 365 days out of the year. He may not be romantic. He may not be full of surprises. He may not always shower me with gifts. However, all the things he does every other day of the week is what truly matter and make me feel loved. A bouquet of flowers, a box of chocolates or a piece of jewelry given to me on this day is not something I expect from him. Today is just one day, a glorified holiday in my opinion, and it should not discount all the other days of the year that my husband shows me that he loves me.

1. I play soccer every Thursday night & my husband stays home with the girls so I can have this time every week. This is love.
2. A lot of mornings, my husband sets out my cereal bowl, fills it with cereal, and fills my OJ glass before I get out to the kitchen. This is love.
3. He tells me that I have a cute butt multiple times a day and sometimes (ok a lot of times) will give it a love tap. This is love.
4. He hugs & kisses me everyday & says “I love you.” This is love.
5. He fixes my car when something goes wrong with it. This is love.
6. He rubs out my calfs before every soccer game so I don’t get a calf strain. This is love.
7. He provides for our family and never complains or throws it in my face. This is love.
8. He will drive the entire way to my parents house when we visit and drive the entire way home while I sit in the passenger seat and scroll my phone, read a book, or just relax-never having to drive one mile out of the 4 hour trip there and back. This is love.
9. He gets more excited when I shoot a deer during deer hunting then when he does. This is love.
10. He deals with all technology problems because he knows I hate it. This is love.
11. He will watch any movie that I pick to watch on a Friday or Saturday evening. This is love.
12. He vacuums, cleans up the dinner mess and occassionally will even make dinner so I don’t have to. This is love.
13. He calls me at least once a day during the work hour just to say “hi” and check in or ask how my day is going. This is love.
14. He listens to me when I am upset, emotional, or need just need an ear. This is love.
15. He remembers special dates in our timeline together and never fails to reminisce about those days with me. This is love.
16. I fart and he laughs, he farts and he tries to dutch oven me in bed. So gross, but we still laugh. As he says flatuence is funny. This is love.
17. He may make comments about my love for clothes & shoes (in his eyes I have too many shoes and too many clothes), but he still moved a lot of his clothes out of our closet so I could have the space and he now has minimal hanging space. This is love.
18. When he makes an Amazon order, he sometimes skims my wish list and will add something I want to his order. This is love.
19. He puts loads the dishes in the dishwasher every morning or unloads the dishwasher if it’s full so I don’t have to. This is love.
20. He sometimes fills the gas tank in my car when it needs it. This is love.
21. He enjoys spending time with my Dad. This is love.
22. He lets me listen to my podcast of choice every morning while we are getting ready during the week. This is love.
23. He uses google calendar so we are on the same page with life events. This is love.
24. He puts K to bed everynight so I can put E to bed since I am with K during the day and don’t see E during the day. This is love.
25. My favorite thing on earth is getting gently tickled. It is so relaxing. I ask him to tickle me almost everyday and he usually does. This is love.

My list could easily continue…but ladies, you get the point. If your expectations are not met today, think of all the other little millions of little things your man does for you every other day of the year. Sure, flowers can be a nice gesture…but flowers die. I’d rather have all of the little things mentioned above and really know what it is to be grateful for them and appreciate them…then getting mad over NOT getting flowers today. The little things truly are the big things. Those little things add up. My heart is full today because of all the millions of ways my husband shows me love every single day of the year. I hope you are shown and given love by your significant other every single day of the year, this is love.